Today was my birthday celebrations. Nothing fancy, nothing cliche. But boy did I have fun! Lasertag. Best. Game. Ever. People say you're too old for this stuff. I say they don't know anything! But besides that, the main highlight of the day was actually something more mundane, something always looked over at. It was a hearty talk with a dear, dear friend.
I have never felt like life sucked, or that my life was a sad one. Nop, not me. I'm not 'emo' so to speak. But one thing I've been feeling this year, this holiday, is a sense that nothing, nothing is going as plan. Nothing is going right. You know its funny, I look back at all the blogs I've created in hope of recognition, and I read the posts I think to myself: my gosh, was this me? was this really who I was? I had such hope, such confidence in the future, with God, Jesus being my unbending strength and unyielding force in molding me and making my future a bright one.
Secondary 4. Reality check. My future? Only as real as my Os. My life? Only as good as my shitty CCA. All in all, myself? Gone. Disappeared. Poof, I'm not the same boy trusting God for hope anymore. No sir, I was a sad, pessimistic guy, rowing on life's mundane waters.
And then today's chat happen. Yokhei breathed life into my situation. Call it God sent, call it perfect timing, call it divine intervention. Whatever it was, I'm grateful that God has sent me a reminder that he has not forgotten me. No way, God is still very much working in me, completing his work in me. We chat for a long time, but time seemed to freeze, caught in the immense depth of our conversation, frozen in the cool refreshing breeze which strangely brought warmth to my heart. Warmth of knowing that in my walk, in this situation, I was not alone.
Great friends are still here for me. Yokhei is the culmination of great friends. I used to think that to be close to someone, you have to spend a lot of time with them, go out, eat together, do anything. As long as you're together, well then I suppose the gel will come and you guys will stick. Well, I thought wrong. We've been apart for close to 4 years now, meeting only in fleeting moments of football or lunch but something was still within us. For me at least, I felt the gel still there, the bond still there. Great friend quality still with us. Time not spent together? Didn't mean anything to this glue. I felt that it was actually God who placed this glue here, as a reminder to myself that God is outside time and space, and that God given Friendships are also God kept ones.
And for that, I am grateful. I've seen life with more happiness, more hope again. Not blind hope which I think I had years back, but hope knowing that sure life sucks sometimes, but it can only get better. With God, with such friends, how can things be worse? And for now, for this situation, I just have to look at the bright side of things. Cliche as it might be, the glass half full is really better than the glass half empty.
wo really long post cause I don't know the average length of a blog...
well, thanks yokhei for everything and life, here I come again. You might hit me down, but I'll keep coming back at ya!
加油
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